To paraphrase:

  • No images of women in bikinis
  • No images of men in bikinis!  (eek….luckily I missed all of these)

  • No skin

  • No silhouettes that indicate that Wobble can be used for wobbling boobs

  • No sexual connotations or innuendo: boobs, babes, booty, sex – all banned

  • Nothing that can be sexually arousing!!

  • No apps will be approved that in any way imply sexual content

To further explain, Wobble is an app that allows you to add Jelly-like wobble motion to any user supplied photo.  So, you could take a picture of a girl in a bikini and add said motion to her breasts.  This was specifically mentioned in a Q&A with Apple over the rules, so don’t’ start thinking that was immediately my idea.

So, no women or men (not that anyone cares about the men) in bikinis.  This seems a little extreme.  How do these kids handle walking through department stores near the ladies underwear section?  Or on the beach?  No skin and no silhouettes really confuses me.  Silhouettes can be sexy looking even if a woman is fully clothed.  And no skin….none!  Wait….what?  Does that mean all models need to have long sleeves?  How much arm is acceptable and how much isn’t?  These are all a little silly, but I can at least understand some semblance of what they are trying to do here, even if it’s maybe a tad too broad.

Now, while I understand the need to curtail some of the wording… Babes or Booty really something we need to start censoring?  Nothing that can be sexually arousing or imply sexual content seem a little subjective.  I never got the whole foot thing, but apparently a lot of people actually can get pretty aroused at the site of women’s feet.  I don’t get it, but wouldn’t that mean that any shoe apps (if there are any) could potentially fall under this?

Now what’s really interesting is that while hundreds of apps have already been removed, a Playboy app and the SI Swimsuit App are still available.  Apparently if you have a big enough name it doesn’t matter.

Maybe I’m just bitching for bitchings sake, but it seems like it would be simpler just to make a better parental control, or a separate app store that required some high form of age protection.  All in all I guess it really doesn’t matter much, considering most if not all of the “sexy” apps that were out there sucked anyways…..or, at least that’s what I heard.  The rules just seemed a little over the top and rather broad in what they covered.

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